Why Your Love Life Sucks and Why Mine Probably Never Will: Introduction

The Nerve of the Writer


What makes you think you know so much about love, Nikki?

I truly believe I experience true and real love everyday. This is just my testimony – love is a powerful force.

What are your toxic traits/ character flaws? 

I can be emotionally detached and aloof, so unaware of a man’s romantic emotions it is as if I act like they don’t exist. Demanding, fastidious (so what if I stare at you for 30 seconds straight? I’m trying to see something), equivocating (I call this silent language), pretentious (yeah, and so what?), confusing, and most of all, impatient (I thought this list would never end). But at least you know I’m excellent at taking responsibility for my faults.

What are your best traits? 

I’ve somehow managed to develop an insane sense of humor, but it really works. And when I’m having an exceptional day, I can be intelligent – genius even – and feel so smart I might even be able to turn on CNN or something. I really love Jesus, so that’s a plus. But the rest I can just name off the top of my head: amazing, enchanting, and life-changing. Now, use your imagination to think about synonyms for those, humble surely being one of them.

How have these traits affected your love life overall?

While I am impatient in many ways, my romantic interest has always been a gradual endeavor. I don’t know why I’ve always been like this, but for the most part, it has always lead me in the right direction. It takes longer than months, sometimes years for me to have a constant attraction. I am extremely finicky, so in order for me to avoid hurting others and hurting myself, I move carefully until I am sure there is a fixed attraction.

Has this ever been a serious problem for the opposite sex?

All the time. Emotions? A phenomena.

Yes, everyone loves a handsome and intelligent man, but what are you REALLY attracted to? 

Everyone that I have ever been attracted to has been completely different, but something they all have knowledge of both common sense and intelligent conversation. Physically speaking, it’s a spectrum. I really love men with handsome features though – not pretty – handsome. Oh, and a huge head. 

So where is your perfect boyfriend? 

I don’t have one, and I probably never will. (More details in the series)

What do you feel is a dishonest belief about ‘love’? 

There is nothing that is necessarily  dishonest  about love – it’s such a vast emotion and idea, it holds no bounds.

Before this series, what is something that you’d like to say to women?

A man who loves you will rarely deal with your toxic traits – rather, they will never incite them. Toxic traits, especially when they are a fabric of your character, are to be worked with from the inside out. No one can be a better person for you than you.

Before this series, what is something that you’d like to say to men?

This article is definitely for you. While men and women both have contrasting hormonal patterns that prioritize different needs and desires, I do believe as a human, we all want the same thing: to be loved. I hope you read this and gain from it, more than you thought you could. Much love.

Without further ado, You’re Welcome in Advance!